So, people, today’s rant is dedicated to all those fellow shoppers who just can’t seem to stop annoying us. We’ve all seen em. We all know em. You know who you are.
- 5 – People who hit other shoppers (and various other objects) with their shopping carts: So, apparently, supermarkets now need to institute safe shopping cart driving guides and rules of the grocery road. Like, for example, it is NOT productive to race down the produce aisle of your local supermarket at 40 miles an hour, mowing down everything (and everyone) in your path. Unfortunately, I think we all know what it’s like to be hit head-on by a stray shopping cart. Not cool.
- 4 – Shoppers who haggle over coupons with customer service: Seriously, what’s up with the people who will spend literally an hour arguing with supermarket staff over ten cent off coupons? Look, I know, times are tough, jobs are hard to find, and the economy is hibernating, but seriously, is ten cents going to make it or break it for you? Maybe they should look at the long line forming behind them and recognize that people have more important issues with customer service like, “You guys are all out of Heineken!”. Grrrr.
- 3 – Inconsiderate shoppers with more than ten items at the express counter: Dude. Can you, like, not read the prominently displayed sign above the express checkout counter? It clearly says: “Ten Items or Less”. Here, I’ll translate for you. Ten means ten. Not thirty, not twenty, not even fifteen. Shocking, I know. Maybe you should think about the people waiting in line behind you to checkout quickly while you’re taking your sweet time because you can’t (or choose not to) count. Get a life. Like, now. Thanks.
- 2 – One word – Children. Don’t bring kids shopping with you: This one is self-explanatory. I hope. Okay, just to be on the safe side, I’ll spell it out for ya. Don’t bring your kids to the supermarket with you! Yes, I know they’re sweet and the love of your life, but no one, I repeat, no one wants to have navigate the grocery aisles while weaving around screaming four year olds screeching for gummi bears or ducking when your toddler decides to fling fresh roast beef across the store. True story. Just leave em at home with the Teletubbies. Trust me.
- 1 – People who leave full shopping carts right in the middle of the grocery aisles: We’ve all gone through this harrowing experience, and honestly, it’s time to end it. You. Yes, you. Be a considerate human being (not a familiar term, I know. Google it.) and move that shopping cart laden with mashed bananas and constipation medication to the side of the aisle. Really, it’s not that difficult, I promise. Realize that your inconsiderate behavior single-handedly creates chaos in what should be a peaceful shopping experience.
I know I certainly haven’t covered all the possible annoyances that we encounter in our daily grocery shopping, so please, my esteemed readers, do feel free to add your own. As sarcastic as I might be, I really do love to hear your thoughts. And don’t forget – Jerklogic is now accepting submissions, so rant away!
What about shoppers that spend half an hour trying to decide what to buy and then leave the basket on the floor and leave the store after they decide that today wasnt the day to go shopping after all. meanwhile the friend on the phone just wasted half an hour trying to convince him that it was the chocolate he wanted!!
It’s truly a travesty, Chany. But consider, as annoying as it is, it’s more of nuisance to the supermarket staff than the grocery shopping world.
AMEN, BROTHER. Especially the one about the “CHILDREN” UGH.
The number one worst shoppers…people who enter a store 5 minutes before it closes and then think they get to take their time browsing items. Then they get pissed off when a clerk approaches them and tells them they have to leave in 5 minutes.
This comment was originally posted on Reddit
The number one worst shoppers…people who enter a store 5 minutes before it closes and then think they get to take their time browsing items. Then they get pissed off when a clerk approaches them and tells them they have to leave in 5 minutes.
The number 5’s can be pretty useful when the number 2’s are around though.
This comment was originally posted on Reddit
The number 5′s can be pretty useful when the number 2′s are around though.
Two extremely annoying types.
1. Coin purse fumblers. Determined to pay cash with the exact change and has all their currency as well as change crammed into a miniscule change purse. Will inevitably winding up counting out many pennies one at a time to finish the transaction.
2. Check writers who seemingly do not know that payment will be expected until the groaning shopping cart has been entirely emptied and checkout clerk enunciates the total. Then some reflex finally fires in their tiny brains and they begin to laboriously write out the checks – seemingly in painstakingly difficult calligraphy judging by how long it takes. You’re buying groceries for God’s sake! You have to pay! Get the checkbook out when the clerk starts checking and get everything but the amount finalized.
5 – Dont run into bangers here, people are pretty confrontational
4 – I’m usually in the self checkout lane so i dont run into these people
3 – Yeah so they have 15 items, as long as the store has the right clerk i dont mind
2 – If you keep them in your cart, and can keep them quiet, fine. If they’re rowdy, running around, and yelling all over the place. GTFO
1 – I’m partially responsible for this, i however keep my cart to the very side of the large isles, and walk into the narrow ones to grab what i need when im browsing. That way i dont block traffic in either direction and the wide isle accomodates easily.
Although I 100% agree with the “annoying shoppers” post I must point out that children are part of my little family. They are VERY well behaved but obviously do act like “children” from time to time. You want me to “leave them at home”? My husband and I need to go shopping and we will not leave them at home alone nor pay a babysitter JUST to go to the store. Obviously you either A.) Don’t have children of your own or B.) Do have children and are not responsible for them 24/7.
Hi,
Your carnival sumbission has had a couple of comments over at my blog. It’s a very funny piece, well done!
Nadine said…
Cool blog! Looking forward to reading some more x
Top 5 annoying shoppers has to be the funniest thing i’ve read today
Ingrid said…
haha! great idea, love the top 5′ves! yeah annoying shoppers, HILARIOUS!