Okay, I’m in a bad mood so forgive me if I bite your head off here without bothering to chew. That disclaimer aside, what in the name of all that is holy has happened to society? This has frustrated me before, my friends, but we are being replaced my machines. And no, I don’t believe in Nostrodamus, the impending apocalypse, or suicidal Oompa Loompas.

Technology is awesome and all, but it makes me see bright, fiery red when people replace any social interaction with technology. Dude. Texting is awesome if you’ve got something quick to say, but honestly, how can you not realize that it will never replace in-person interaction or even a phone conversation? God. They’re just empty words. Yes, words have personality and feeling too – But nowhere close to real one-on-one. It seems as though texting, email, Blackberry messenger and Facebook have conveniently made the population at large forget that there’s a real world out there – REAL people, REAL interaction!

I’m the first to admit that technology is awesome and definitely has its uses, but it’s replacing our lives! Remember that scene in Wall-E where all the human beings are upwards of 400 pounds, get rolled around in motorized wheelchairs, are attended to by freaky looking robots and whose vocabulary range borders that of a four-year old? That’s where we’re headed! Look, I’ll shut up now (finally), but do us all (and yourselves) a favor – Leave the cell at home. Go out. Have fun with some real people. Get completely wasted at 5 in the morning and pee on the street corner of a busy street while laughing hysterically….and then tell me that Facebook is more fun. God. Who’s with me?

PS. Yes, I do realize that I’m not making my case any stronger by encouraging people to respond online. Well, smartass, I’m only making an exception here because the last thing I need right now is my poor blackberry ringing off the hook with my disgruntled readers calling me dirty names, questioning the legitimacy of my conception and generally calling me a hypocrite. So, my lovely readers (yes, yes, I do really love you), do what you do best: Comment!

Tags: Email, Etiquette, Facebook, Social, Technology, Texting

Alright, you got me, I admit it. I’m a total geek. I make sweet, sweet love to my Blackberry Curve on a regular basis, all my music is in MP3 format, and, yes, Google is my friend (with benefits). Gotta love technology, right? I mean, gone our the days where we actually had to remember phone numbers (hell, I’ll be damned if I even remember my own), a limitless music library is just a click away and most of us pay our bills (gag) without using a single shred of paper. Sounds completely awesome, doesn’t it? A sci-fi world come to life – Ahhhh….

…Well, maybe not. All of this has gotten me thinking (if you smell smoke, call the Feds). All of this supposedly remarkable technology is slowly but surely robbing us humans of what’s most valuable to us – Our minds. We can’t remember phone numbers, appointments, holidays or even simple directions any longer without using our trusty phones or doing a quick internet search. Our spelling is going down the tubes, because, hey, Word’s got a built-in spell check, and our handwriting (what’s that?) – well, with email and electronic bill payments, who the hell needs to write anymore? I’m actually rather surprised the ink manufacturers haven’t gone bankrupt, one by one. Here, my friends, is where The Machines begin to get smarter than we are, and that will be a sad, sad day for us all.

So, come on, think about it – I’m the first to admit technology is a beautiful thing, but am I the only one out there who thinks its beginning to get a bit….too wonderful? I’m just waiting with bated breath to know what you all think, and, yes, as always, death threats, booing and little dead fishes in my mailbox are always welcome.

Tags: Blackberry, Email, Geek, Sci Fi, Social Interaction, Texting